Friday, June 4, 2010

Scrappy Self Esteem



I made this page with the Studio Calico May kit and had so much fun making it. It was so lovely to feel that way, because I haven't been feeling 100% great about scrapping lately.

I've been struggling with feeling not good enough. Not creative enough, not innovative enough, not enough period.

I don't mean this post to be whiny, and I hope it doesn't come out that way. I just want to share what I'm experiencing because I'm sure some of you have felt this way at some point, too.

It's difficult to know how much involvement in the scrapbooking pub/design world is good for me, considering how bad the rejection can make me feel. But then on the other hand, I love the human connection and sharing that comes from being involved in the industry and working with other people who love this hobby as much as I do.

I think this is part of a larger insecurity I've been feeling lately, as my life is about to change dramatically and the things that make me "me" have to get reexamined. I'm sure it will pass. but right now, it really is stinky! Have any of you ever felt this way?

Well, on a positive note.......I'm making a tomato/watermelon/basil salad tonight and am quite looking forward to it! There are few things in my fresh basil can't cure:)

19 comments:

  1. I love what you did with the kraft envie!

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  2. Your layout is perfect. I too love the envelope. What a neat touch.
    We all feel this way from time to time. It will pass. Creatively maybe make a card, or something that you normally wouldn't do. Or go and look at some crappy layouts someone else did, LOL. Ok that wasn't nice but thought you could use a laugh. Plus it is late and I should be sleeping right now.

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  3. Your LO is fabulous girl - your have no reason to feel "not good enough"! If you are happy with your creations that is the one person you have to impress!

    Sure we all feel that we aren't good enough (scrapbooking wise and more) but you are one amazingly kind girl. Even if I have only known you via the internet I am certain that you are as genuine as they come!

    Now threat yourself to a delicious piece of Reeses cup and have another one for me. ;o)

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  4. I love your LO. I know that I feel this way a lot of the time. I've never been published so can understand how you might feel that you're 'not good enough' but it's totally not true. And by the way that salad sounds amazing!

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  5. Yes, I love fresh basil! What a great salad! I say, create layouts for yourself and not care if anyone likes it. I know it's easier to say than do but creativity works in a way that you can't please everyone. It's so subjective. Everyone likes a different style or color combo or type of photography. If you really want to do the business side just keep trying and be true to your own style. Eventually it will pay off I'm sure! And you still end up with layouts you like!! But I do know how you feel that is why I haven't really tried...I'm afraid it will just make me upset.

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  6. Gosh K! I know it is so hard! I find myself feeling that way a lot too! The type A in us? Who knows. I struggle. I have been liking my LOs lately (as I am staying true to myself) but feel like I can't get a good pic of the layout. I don't know what it is, but it just never seems to line up, just right, if you know what I mean.

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  7. PS -wonderful LO! Love what you did with the envelope!

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  8. Love how you journaled on the envie!
    As far as your other question...of course! I think we all feel insecurities from time to time...especially when we are sharing in such a large pool where our work might get lost before it even gets noticed. I think it's important to scrap to tell YOUR stories, to do what you love creatively, and to scrap when the urge strikes you not because you are pushing yourself to create. That is when your best pages will be made:)

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  9. You ARE good enough. I know it's hard, but try not to let thoughts of rejection ruin your scrapping experiences. Scrap first and foremost for YOURSELF....and your family. Hugs.

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  10. LOVE your layout! and I had no choice but to lose some of the things that made me, me. it does stink. but then you look to find other ways to fill that void.

    do this for fun first and foremost and you will never be disappointed!

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  11. Your LO is gorgeous! I am sorry you are feeling down about your scrappy stuff, but you shouldn't be because your work is fabulous! It is hard not to let the rejection get to you, but just remind yourself that you are scrapping for yourself instead of everyone else.

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  12. not coming accross as whiney at all. And i can completely relate. I think we all get bogged down in the not good enoughs and some times its harder to pull out then others!!

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  13. I stamped that image onto the exact same paper and placed it on one of those Maya Road envelopes, on a page I did last week! Are we psychically scrapbook connected?! haha! i really like the placement of the envelope, this page is really cool. i totally get what you mean about the whole pub issue. It's so hard because it sometimes seems like the same people get picked up time and time again. i started submitting for calls quite a bit a few months back, but i found i wasn't liking the pages that i was making because they were a bit forced. i haven't stopped submitting but i only submit if i already have a page i love that i think fit's the call. Takes the pressure off a bit. :)

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  14. sending hugs... really, the best advice is to do it for YOU. if the page makes you happy, it's good enough. if it gets picked up or gets you on a DT, well, than that's awesome. but i find that the best way to push yourself is to be comfortable in your own creative skin.

    this page is gorgeous! =)

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  15. oooooo hope you're feeling better. and your lo's just rock. they're so pretty. love them. i agree do what makes you happy - the rest w/fall into place.

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  16. hey girlie, i think you are amazing and i adore your work!!!

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  17. It's quite a common feeling amongst many in the industry and it's not at all unusual to feel frustrated and bogged down by the challenges that present themselves while developing a recognizable role in the industry as a designer. The greatest piece of advice I can give to you is to be yourself and to do what you love...though, at the same time, don't be afraid to share your work with the community. Post your work in online galleries, send it to manufacturers (on a whim! We're always looking for projects to post at the Crate Paper blog) and magazines and continue to share it on your blog. This is exactly how most designers begin their journey...it's constantly ongoing, so always remember to stay true to you also. By the way, you're layouts look fabulous!! They're so very cute :)

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  18. I love your work, too Keshet. I really don't understand the process by which items are selected for publication but I think there are many variables that change from month to month. I agree with the some of the others that you need to stay true to what you are comfortable with and not force the issue. I've been guilty of this and have to remind myself all the time when I stray too far. Hang in there and if you want to be pubbed, just keep submitting what you love.

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Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment! I love hearing your thoughts:)